Boul

Vara torida. Niki e in Romania la bunici. E plecat in misiune cu doua scopuri clare: sa se ingrase pana la toamna si sa invete romaneste. Bine, si Kumon, dar asta este “by default”.

Ma suna pe Skype.

“Dad?”

“Cine e mah cocoshu’ lu’ tata, dandanaua, corcodusha, baragaiu’ lu tata, dadarelu’, castrav..

“Daaaaaaad!!!”

“Da Niki!”

“What is “bou” in Romanian..”

“Well, “bou” is the ox”.

“Ox!?”

“Stii Niki vaca? Animalul adica? Vaca e fata si boul e baiatul”

... ...

“It doesn’t make any sense”

“Why not?”

“De ce Bica a zis la copil Mah boule!”

Eu, hiperventilat: “Care copil!?”

Niki, tipand mai tare ca mine: “He tried to choke me!!!”

“What did you do!?”

“Nothiiiing, I did nothiiiing to him, he jumped on top and he tried to choke me. I called Bica” se precipita Niki la mine. “She came and she said to the kid “Esti un bou mah boule!””

Eu, deabia abtinandu/ma din ras: “Are you good now?”

Niki, alintandu/se: “Yeaaaah, I aaaam, but my neck is red. My eyes were almost popping out. I didn’t cry though. (Niki e ca mine. Exagereaza adica. Eu il cunosc dupa voce)

” How red?”

“Redish..it is kind of pink now...you can barely see anything different...Why did she called him “boule”?”

Well, hm, in Romanian language we call like this mean people, the people doing or saying something bad. We only do that when we are really upset. Bica loves you very much and when she saw what happened she lost control for a bit.”

Niki, in viteza:“Dad I need to go now. Noi acuma mergem sa luam ouale de la gaina. By daaad!”

Nu mai apuc sa zic si eu “bye” si skype/ul se inchide. Niki e bine si in grafic. Invata romaneste pe paine.

Lucian Vasiliu

Stoney Creek, July 2015